You Do You, Mama!

On permission culture

If you’ve ever spent one day on the Mom internet, you’ve likely encountered permission culture, a cheerleader assuring you that it’s okay, you know best, you’re doing great. This is the very specific tone of so much of the mom-focused content I see both on social media and in real life. The “you do you, mama!” shouted in every comment section, the “give yourself so much grace,” chorus of reassurance from our mom friends, even the borderline-bullying “leave the dishes, they’re only little once!” from our elders who’ve been there.

I’ll be the first to admit that I have consumed this content, at times even eagerly, and even written some of it myself. Strategically lowering expectations, conceding to practicality, and dropping the ball are often the only ways many moms make it through the absolute hurricane of a busy week.